How Marriage Shapes Everything

How Marriage Shapes Everything

Marriage. It’s often described as a cornerstone of society, a necessary institution that impacts every aspect of our lives. Some may even call it a necessary evil, but its influence is undeniable. It’s the first form of governance we encounter—a microcosm of society where all other relationships stem from.

Think about it: every social bond we form—whether with friends, colleagues, or neighbors—traces back to the foundational relationship between father and mother. When this relationship is not only strong but also nurtured within a close, exclusive husband-wife dynamic, it sets the stage for other relationships to flourish.

Good marriages don’t follow a one-size-fits-all formula. Instead, they serve as the bedrock of resilient societies, laying the groundwork for strong families. Within these marriages, the five basic institutions of society are cultivated: family, church, school, marketplace, and government. When these foundational tasks are carried out in harmony between father and mother, the result is a solid marriage. This kind of union becomes the fertile ground where children learn to value and fulfill these essential societal roles as they grow into competent adults and active members of society.

Does Marriage Matter?

The short answer? Absolutely.

Numerous studies show that children raised outside of intact marriages face a higher risk of falling into poverty, suffering from child abuse, struggling in school, and dropping out. These children are more likely to engage in illegal drug use, premature sexual activity, and, in some cases, become unwed teen parents. Their futures can often include a higher likelihood of divorce, mental health challenges, physical illness, and criminal activity. Even when factors like income and parental conflict are considered, children from non-marital backgrounds often fare worse in their careers.

Marriage doesn’t just safeguard children; it also protects society and taxpayers from the enormous personal and communal costs associated with these challenges. Beyond that, marriage plays a crucial role in building and maintaining human and social capital, not just for children but also for adults. Its impact on health, wealth, and well-being is almost as significant as education, making it a vital component in fostering thriving communities.

Can Marriage Save Your Life?

Marriage isn’t just about emotional or social stability; it can literally add years to your life. Research shows that among ten married men alive at age 48, all ten are likely to reach age 65. Compare this to only six out of ten single men in the same age group. The message is clear: married people tend to live longer, healthier lives.

This trend is especially noticeable in late middle age. For women, the benefits are also significant, though slightly less pronounced. Nine out of ten married women alive at age 48 will live to see their senior years, while only eight out of ten divorced or single women will do the same.

The Criminal Elements in Marriage

It’s a cliché that money and sex are the biggest stressors in marriage, but they’re far from the only factors that can make or break a relationship. Unhealthy dynamics, hurtful behaviors, and misplaced priorities can spell the difference between a thriving marriage and one that crumbles.

Issues like lack of communication, third-party influence, addictive behavior, financial disparities, and a dwindling interest in shared activities can instinctively undermine the very foundation of a marriage.

What’s Next?

Marriage, with all its complexities, remains a powerful force in shaping individuals and society at large. It’s more than just a social contract; it’s a pivotal element that influences every aspect of our lives—from the personal to the communal, from the emotional to the practical. Understanding its impact, and nurturing it with care, can lead to stronger families, healthier communities, and ultimately, a better world.

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Lagos, Nigeria